There's Things that Matter and Things that Don't

Just the other day, someone came driving up to my business in a shiny blue Ford pickup and honked the horn. I had actually been kicked back in my chair with my feet propped up. Immediately I went in to "business" mode and quickly sat up straight and took my feet off the front porch post. (You gotta make a good impression for customers, right?) The only thing is, this wasn't a customer...well sort of not a customer. it was my grandfather in a new truck. He had brought it by from the dealership. They were letting him take it for a test run before he bought it. Since I'm the vehicle enthusiast that I am, I complimented it and checked it our...roof to chassis. We looked up the blue book value and I took it for a drive up the road while my grandfather sat on the porch of the business building. When I got back, we talked a little and he took it back to the dealership to finalize the deal. Why am I telling this? Well, my grandfather was excited about his new truck (I was too. It was sharp. I may borrow it)...so much so that my grandmother decided to post on Facebook about his excitement. She posted "An old southern man is happy when he has a truck and a tractor." Boy was she right! There's nothing like a man and his tractor- let alone a man and his truck. A man's truck is kinda like his buddy that doesn't talk back or nag at him. A man's truck is part of his identity. We customize them to fit our needs and personalities and take extra care to make sure they are in tip-top shape. Anyway, my grandmother was right- most men definitely are fond of their trucks. Sometimes in life though, we become too fond of material things. This brings me to my next story.

About two or three days ago, an older man whom I have known for a while came into the store. I knew who it was when he pulled in the parking lot, well, because I recognized his truck- an old two tone Ford from the 80s. He got out quickly for a man his age and walked in the door. I said "Good morning Mr. _______. How are you doing this morning?" He replied with a "I'm doing just fine. Little chilly though." He then proceeded to ask me what the prices were on my poinsettias. After I told him, he said "Okay, give me one of them. I'm gonna put it on my wife's grave." As I proceeded to get him one and wrap it up in plastic for transport, he began talking about his wife who was my bus driver my freshman year in high school before I got my license. He said, "It just doesn't seem real. I go into our room and all of her clothes and things are still in there. I can't do anything with them." Now, I didn't know what to say. I said, "Well, things won't ever be the same, but over time it will get better." That wasn't what I wanted to say, but all I could think of at the time. Really, I'm not sure time heals all wounds, especially the wound that comes with losing your spouse. He replied with something like, "I don't know." I then said, "Well, Mr. _______ Mrs. _______ was the best bus driver I ever had." He smiled a little and said, "Yeah she was pretty good." This husband and wife pair had both been driving school buses for years together. You know a husband will often times go out and crank his wife's car on cold mornings before she heads to work so that she doesn't have to get cold. This man, would crank his wife's bus, along with his own, and make sure not only he was warm but his wife and all of the kids that had the privilege of riding their buses. It was obvious that he missed his wife and I thought to myself that very moment that sometimes we just forget how blessed we are to have certain people in our lives.

Today, as I was loading some turnip greens on my truck, I did something that I don't normally do. I grabbed my phone and pulled it out and hit the play button on my music playlist. As I sang along to Chris Young's "Lost," Jason Aldean's "Fly Over States," and George Straight's "Give it All We Got Tonight" I was enjoying the music and hoping nobody showed up and heard my horrible renditions. Then, a song came by Craig Morgan came on called " This Ain't Nothin' " The words are:

He was standin' in the rubble
Of an old farmhouse outside Birmingham
When some on-the-scene reporter
Stuck a camera in the face of that old man

He said, "Tell the folks, please mister, what are you gonna do
Now that this twister has taken all that's dear to you"
The old man just smiled and said, "Boy, let me tell you somethin'
This ain't nothin'"

He said, "I lost my daddy when I was eight years old
That cave-in at the Kincaid Mine left a big ol' hole
And I lost my baby brother, my best friend, and my left hand
In a no-win situation in a place called Vietnam"

"And last year, I watched my lovin' wife
Of fifty years waste away and die
And I held her hand 'til her heart of gold stopped pumpin'
So, this ain't nothin'"

He said, "I learned at an early age
There's things that matter, and there's things that don't
So if you're waitin' here for me to cry
I hate to disappoint you boy, but I won't"

Then he reached down in the rubble and picked up a photograph
Wiped the dirt off of it with the hand that he still had
He put it to his lips and he said, "Man she was somethin'
But, this ain't nothin'"

He said, "I lost my daddy when I was eight years old
That cave-in at the Kincaid Mine left a big ol' hole
And I lost my baby brother, my best friend, and my left hand
In a no-win situation in a place called Vietnam"

"And last year, I watched my lovin' wife
Of fifty years waste away and die
We were holdin' hands when her heart of gold stopped pumpin'
So, this ain't nothin'"

He said, "This ain't nothin' time won't erase
And this ain't nothin' money can't replace"

He said, "You sit and watch your lovin' wife
Of fifty years fightin' for her life
Then you hold her hand 'til her heart of gold stops pumpin'
Yeah, boy that's somethin'"

"So, this ain't nothin'
No, this ain't nothin'"

Songwriters
Chris Du Bois;Kerry Kurt Phillips

Published by
SEA GAYLE MUSIC

The song really struck a chord with me and the gentleman that had just been there at my business only a few days before, especially the words "And last year, I watched my lovin' wife of fifty years waste away and die
and I held her hand 'til her heart of gold stopped pumpin'" They describe that man. The only difference is, he was in the hospital when his wife died and didn't get that chance to hold her hand. Although he probably would have and in some way he still does today in more of a spiritual way. So, if I haven't learned anything this week, I have learned more about the true "measure" of a real man. A real man values those close to him He appreciates them and does all he can for them. Yes, my grandfather was happy about his new truck, but make no mistake that truck comes dead last when it comes to his family. That's the way I've come to feel too and the way I know the gentleman who lost his wife feels. So, I say material things "ain't nothin' " but those you love are "somethin' " That, my friends, is just a few thoughts from a small town southern man.

Here's a link to Craig Morgan's "This Ain't Nothin'":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSdItuvBxc8

Where's my turn-by-turn directions?

"A man's heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps." - Proverbs 16:9

I stumbled across this verse tonight. I'm glad I did. I've stumbled a lot in life (over briar patches in the woods, over my own feet sometimes, etc.) That kind of stumbling, though, is the least of my worries. Many times in life, we stumble as Christians. We allow obstacles to block our route or we just simply don't pay attention to where we are going. We haven't mapped out a route.

When you embark on a road trip, before you go, you will most likely plan your route. You have a plan for how to get to your destination and use directions to carry out that plan. If you're like me, you probably just punch an address into the GPS on your phone and hit the "get directions" button. However, if you're like my dad you go old school- paper map and all. I can't tell you the number of times I've started to leave for a road trip and he sarcastically says "You know that phone is gonna send you around the world. You should take a real map, son." Usually, I just brush the comment off and move on. Today, I'm thinking a little deeper on that comment, especially as it can relate to life. What? Relate to life? Give me some time to explain.

You see, life is a journey of sorts, a "road trip." For Christians, our planned destination is heaven. A real man's heart has made plans to arrive at this destination, when the time comes of course. Our "map" is the Bible. However, the "map" is not all we need. You know we need that "GPS" too- the one with the turn-by-turn directions. God is our "GPS." He can direct our steps (turns.) Many times, we forget about the "map," the "GPS" or both. Other times we simply just don't have a plan. However, there's time to formulate one. Let your heart plan the way, but let the Lord direct your steps. Make a decision to make heaven your destination and let God lead the way.

In each blog post, I give some of my thoughts on what the real "measure" of a man is. Tonight, I think that the real "measure" of a man is not whether he has the latest phone with the greatest GPS. No, part of the real "measure" of a man is his desire to have a plan for his life and let the Lord direct his steps. That plan can encompass many things- being a Godly husband or father or son, serving others, sharing God's word, etc. God wants to see us have goals and make plans that involve Him. Sometimes, God allows us to go through with the parts of our plan that are best for us. Other times, he takes us on a detour that was a better route anyway.The bottom line is, Give God your heart and let Him direct your steps. So, let your heart make a plan, grab the "map" and the "GPS" and let the Lord give you turn-by-turn directions. That's just a few thoughts from this small town southern man.

It's Not as Easy as it Looks

It's not as easy as it looks. Have you ever said those words? I have-all the time. Chances are that I'm over exaggerating, but sometimes I'm not.

I began my day early this morning. Well, it was early for me at least. By 6:45, I was on the road headed to make a business run to pick up some poinsettias to sell for the Christmas season. As I hopped into the minivan (No, I don't usually drive a minivan, but live poinsettias don't exactly stand up to 70 mph winds on the back of a Toyota pickup that's normally pedal to the metal. So, don't judge me..lol) I tuned in to my favorite morning radio show-The Rick and Bubba Show. For those of you who aren't familiar with the Rick and Bubba show, by all means get out of your "cityfied" hiding place and enjoy the show. They are awesome. If you don't laugh at least once at their crazy stories, then something is terribly wrong. You should see a doctor. Really though, I enjoy listening to the show because they are just a bunch of good ol' boys who love the Lord, love to laugh, and have great stories to tell. Today, however, the best story didn't come from Rick, Bubba, or any of the other folks from the show. The best story came from a guest on the show. The guest was a former service member who lost an arm and leg in Iraq. He told his story and how hard it was to cope with life after his injury. He talked of depression and doubt and how things were difficult for him. BUT...that was only a small portion of what he talked about. He shared how he overcame the depression and doubt and began running marathons and competing in highly physical activities- all with just one arm and one leg. It's not as easy as it looks, now is it? Here's a guy with one arm and one leg who can do things that most people with two arms and two legs never think about doing. He was determined. In addition to his accomplishments in breaking down physical barriers, this guy filled listeners in on how he began dating a girl after becoming disabled. The young lady, also a guest on the show, seemed really "into" this guy-something I found to be pretty interesting. Here's an "average" young woman completely head over heels for this guy- a guy with only one arm and one leg. Make no mistake, the guy was obviously intrigued by her as well. They connected on a deeper level and seemed to look into the heart of one another. This leads me to my first response to the question I posted in the original post from yesterday. What is the "measure" of a man?

Today, I think I learned that part of the "measure" of  a man is not the fact that he has two arms or one. No, part of the "measure" of man is how he deals with life's challenges. Does he allow obstacles to get in his way? A real man doesn't. He pushes through, not only for his own sake, but for the sake of those he cares about.

I also was reminded today that the real "measure" of a man involves how confident he is in himself and how that relates to his relationship with the woman in his life. A confident man does what it takes to be that "knight in shining armor," even if that "knight" isn't exactly the prototype for the position. A confident man knows how to display respect, defend a lady's honor, make her laugh, and help her through life's struggles. So, men be confident in yourself. You can do what you need to do, as long as you try. Ladies, don't settle for less than a confident man- a guy who knows what the true "measure" of a man is and allows you to see into his heart and not just his sunglasses.

Finally, I was reminded that the "measure" of man has nothing to do with whether he has two arms, one arm, or none (I have met a guy who had no arms before and he was absolutely one of the most independent individuals I've ever met.) The "measure" of man has nothing to do with whether a guy is 6 ft 5 or 4 foot 2. The "measure" of a man has nothing to do with whether a man lives in a billion dollar mansion or a 2 room house on an old dirt road. The "measure" of man has nothing to do with whether he drives a Porsche, a minivan, or just a pickup truck. The "measure" of  man has everything to do with his outlook on his own life and those who are closest to him. That, my friends is just a few thoughts from a small town southern man.

"Born the middle son of a farmer
And a small town Southern man
Like his daddy's daddy before him
Brought up workin' on the land

Fell in love with a small town woman
And they married up and settled down
Natural way of life if you're lucky
For a small town Southern man

First there came four pretty daughters
For this small town Southern man
Then a few years later came another
A boy, he wasn't planned

Seven people livin' all together
In a house built with his own hands
Little words with love and understandin'
From a small town Southern man

And he bowed his head to Jesus
And he stood for Uncle Sam
And he only loved one woman
He was always proud of what he had

He said his greatest contribution
Is the ones you leave behind
Raised on the ways and gentle kindness
Of a small town Southern man

Callous hands told the story
For this small town Southern man
He gave it all to keep it all together
And keep his family on his land

Like his daddy, years wore out his body
Made it hard just to walk and stand
You can break the back
But you can't break the spirit
Of a small town Southern man

And he bowed his head to Jesus
And he stood for Uncle Sam
And he only loved one woman
He was always proud of what he had

He said his greatest contribution
Is the ones you leave behind
Raised on the ways and gentle kindness
Of a small town Southern man

Finally death came callin'
For this small town Southern man
He said it's alright 'cause I see angels
And they got me by the hand

Don't you cry, and don't you worry
I'm blessed, and I know I am
'Cause God has a place in Heaven
For the small town Southern man

And he bowed his head to Jesus
And he stood for Uncle Sam
And he only loved one woman
He was always proud of what he had

He said his greatest contribution
Is the ones you leave behind
Raised on the ways and gentle kindness
Of a small town Southern man

Raised on the ways and gentle kindness
Of a small town Southern man

Songwriters
Jackson, Alan Eugene

In today's society the small town southern man described in the song lyrics above seems to be a rare find, but they are out there. I know a few of them and would never be opposed to being considered one myself.  More importantly, being an honorable, hard working man is something every guy should strive for. It's not easy sometimes, but it is doable. However, we often don't seem to measure up. So, this leads me to the question: Exactly what is the "measure of a man?" Recently, I've broken my habit of never picking up a book (other than the Bible) and have been reading a book titled "The Measure of a Man." The book's author, Gene Getz explains the events in his life that have helped him come to realize the true "measure" of a man. The book also includes scripture reference for each topic covered. I have enjoyed the book and it really has got me to thinking about what it really means to be a man, especially a man of God. So, I've decided to create this blog to share my thoughts about life and what it means to be a Godly man

Now I do realize that blogging is not something every guy chooses to do, but I'm not "every guy." I never have been. God has blessed me with the gift of being able to share my thoughts through written word and public speaking, and I enjoy doing both. So, let's see where this blog takes me. Of course, not every post will be this serious. After all I have many random thoughts in my head about all sorts of things. So, you might see a variety of posts on a variety of things I'm interested in or passionate about. You might see posts about:

fishing

hunting

Alabama football

politics 

classic cars ('57 Chevy Bel Air  is my dream ride)

Quotes from some of my favorite folks

Song lyrics...got that one covered early

Random funny stories (trust me I've got a few)

Food...feel free to invite me over for supper

Scripture

What it's like running a small business...a very small business

Life in the south...front porches, pine trees, and sweet tea...good stuff

Whatever pops into my head

First and foremost though, I want those who read this post to gain something from it that will help them to see the glory of the Father. I also want to continue to share my thoughts about what really is the "measure" of a man. Finally, I want to do my best to encourage others through sharing the thoughts from a small town southern man. God bless y'all.